Black Mass (2015) - A Biopic of Whiter Bulger

Movies Of The Last 40 Years Suck Dick.

Black Mass - 2/10

I have been interested in Whitey Bulger for years and avoided this movie, and mostly read and listened. 60 Minutes, and other archives. FBI files. Documentaries were good, so I finally gave it a shot.... They got the correct cars, and even had a caption "1975" and then play Fleetwood Mac's song from 1975, "Warm Ways". Big deal.

Thinking it would be good enough for me not to pause it every few minutes because it feels like the world (my world?) is unraveling, because I only love movies, music, and stand-up comedy, although that is dead.

"Black Mass" is an absolute train wreck - easily one of the most disappointing biopics in recent memory. After reading the archives, testimony, books, newspaper articles, and seeing real footage (and listening to some) of Bulger, it only reinforces this has nothing to do with accuracy, just lack of talent trying to make the most money as possible.

Irishmen acting like Italians. They hardly ever cursed to the handful of real people who were there. The entire movie was yelling—people don’t talk this way. Instead of natural dialogue or meaningful conversations, every scene feels like a shouting match. The characters scream and bark their lines as if volume equals intensity, but it just makes the film exhausting and fake. Real people, even in tense situations, don’t communicate like this; it’s all forced noise with zero nuance or rhythm. This constant yelling kills any chance of connection or realism, making the whole experience grating and unbearable. "Fugetaboutit" this movie. The casting is atrocious, the makeup laughable, and the acting so stilted and robotic it feels like watching a bad school play. Johnny Depp’s portrayal of Whitey Bulger is a total misfire. He looks more like Nosferatu than an Irish-American gangster, hiding behind fake teeth, dead eyes, and a costume department’s idea of menace. There’s no humanity, no complexity - just a cold stare, a few muttered threats, and some uninspired violence.The storytelling is equally abysmal. People are shot left and right, but we have no idea who they are or why it matters. Characters are introduced and discarded without depth or purpose. The film skips over the early, formative years of every major figure, robbing the narrative of context or weight. Even the few subplots that show potential are hastily resolved with a line or two and never revisited.Everything about the production feels fake - the accents are terrible, the sets look like cheap replicas, and the whole thing is staged like a bad TV movie. To make things worse, the actors are constantly eating or drinking while speaking, making the already flat dialogue even harder to follow. It’s not gritty or immersive - it’s just gross.There are fleeting hints that this could’ve been a compelling film, but they’re buried under a mountain of bad decisions. I started off disappointed, but on reflection, I can’t name a single redeeming feature. It’s not just bad—it’s worthless. Avoid it.

This is what I get for watching newer movies. I need to follow my own advice. You'd expect even a little talent with these crazy budgets. They couldn't spend an hour doing some research? Then again, I know a few archivists and they came up to me, and I realized they don't know shit, and either have enough money to advertise, or it's nepotism. In this case, they made the movie IMMEDIATELY after Bulger was killed.